Drastic Times

Weird, Interesting or Disturbing News and Current Events along with some unsolicited opinions. Pretty much anything that I believe to be of interest, including politics, religion, conspiracies, values, corruption, etc.

A Nigerian man who says he cannot get a girlfriend because of his bad stutter has announced plans to marry his pillow, claims an article from Ananova.

Okeke Ikechukwu, a 26 year old laborer from Lagos, says that his stammer made it difficult for him to speak to girls. "Since I am a stutterer, ladies have always laughed at me whenever I try to talk to them," he said. "I have needs, and so I have taken to sleeping with my pillow in my arms ever since I was 16. I have grown to fall in love with it, and I intend to spend the rest of my life with it."

Mr Ikechukwu also said that, unlike a woman, the pillow would cost him little or nothing to maintain for the rest of its life. "I think it will make the ideal mate for me," he said.

This story brings up some interesting questions. First, what is the legal age of consent for a pillow in Nigeria? Mr Ikechukwu claims to have been "sleeping" with said pillow for the past 10 years. The age of the pillow is not stated, but he may well have been corrupting the morals of a minor pillow. One the other hand, this relationship began when Mr Ikechukwu was only 16, meaning that the pillow may have corrupted his morals.

Other questions which come to mind are, how is the gender of a pillow determined? Could Mr Ikechukwu have been sleeping all these years with a male pillow? Could this be a same-sex marriage? If however, the pillow is female, do the couple plan on having any children?

Also interesting would be to know whether the wedding will be a church or a civil ceremony? Has Mr Ikechukwu taken the pillow home to Lagos yet to meet his parents? And has Mr Ikechukwu yet traveled to the factory where the pillow was made to gain consent for his wedding?

All in all, although I've never met Mr Ikechukwu, I'd venture to guess that his problem with girls laughing at him are caused by a little more than just his stuttering.

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